About Karen

 

I decided to call this Late to the Party because that always seems to describe me. When pondering the “About Karen” section, I thought using one of those now dated Facebook games would sum it up nicely, so I went back through my Facebook pages and found this legitimate series of questions that people would actually send back and forth to one another. I always thought they were silly and never did one, but answering one now would make me, you know, late to the party. Enjoy.

  1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Well, I’ll start this one off with a simply truthful answer. I was indeed named for my father.
  1. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? I really do have to wonder why grown men and women would be asking each other this.
  1. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Seriously? Grown men and women. But yes, I do think I have beautiful handwriting. Do you know they are not even teaching penmanship in schools anymore?
  1. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? OK, I admit that this question is the reason I chose this particular list. When I was a kid, I would eat liverwurst day and night until I bit into something hard. I’m convinced it was a toenail. To this day just thinking about liverwurst can make me hurl. Excuse me.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Were college kids asking each other this? But no, thankfully I do not have any kids. I don’t even have a uterus anymore.

  1. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? If she were in a good mood.
  1. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Me? Never.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes. But see note about uterus.

  1. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? I worry about buttons jettisoning off certain pairs of my pants; I’m going to strap my entire body to a flimsy piece of plastic????
  1. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Uncle Sam. For every reason you think.
  1. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? What? This is the kind of question where you can tell the guy who began this started getting tired.

WHERE IS QUESTION 12? In my trousers.

  1. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Chocolate/Peanut Butter from Van Dyk’s in Ridgewood. Or French Vanilla from Bischoff’s in Teaneck.
  1. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Doesn’t everyone answer “eyes” to this one? I’ll say butt.
  1. RED OR PINK? What are we talking about here? Wine? Sweaters? My lady parts?
  1. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? Well, I’m kinda…fat.
  1. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? 2 very special people.
  1. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST? Do you see everyone’s name on this blog?
  1. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Pants? I’m unemployed. You make me laugh. Pants. That’s a good one.
  1. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? A commercial for something called “My Pillow.”

21. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Cornflower blue or sea green.

  1. FAVORITE SMELLS? To quote Dennis Miller, “If something comes out of you that smells so bad you need an exhaust fan, you’re about to die within the week anyway.” It doesn’t really answer the question, but it is a funny line.
  1. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Who am I, Julian Assange?
  1. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? I was originally tagged on this thing by my friend Jim, so yes.
  1. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? There is no sport but American football.
  1. HAIR COLOR? Blond Mousy Brown

27. EYE COLOR? Blue

  1. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Touch my eyeballs? Surely you jest.
  1. FAVORITE FOOD? Cheese.

 Lots of cheese.
  1. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? In an actual theater? Gone Girl.
  1. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? It’s really more of a muu muu.
  1. SUMMER OR WINTER? Ask me in six months.
  1. HUGS OR KISSES? I think I’d have to see the person first.
  1. FAVORITE DESSERT? Anything baked by me.
  1. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Yes.
  1. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Deceased relatives.
  1. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? My Pessary, My Friend
  1. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? I used a Beavis & Butthead mouse pad for years.
  1. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? An hour of WKRP in Cincinnati.
  1. FAVORITE SOUND(S)? Well, I can tell you that after I had my colonoscopy, the nurses tried to convince me that my breaking wind 

with rocket-like force was their favorite sound.
  1. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles

 (and Monkees)
  1. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Italy.
  1. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? See #41.
  1. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? I’m not asking anyone else. Are you slow?
  1. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? You’ll have to ask him.
  1. DO YOU STRIVE FOR HAPPINESS OR ENJOY THE DARK SIDE? I like to keep you guessing.
  1. ONE WORD TO DESCRIBE YOU? Awesomelicious.  Or fat.
  1. WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR BEAUTIFUL? Smart

, which I already am.
  2. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST REGRET? Doing this in Word and then pasting it into WordPress.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

One thought on “About Karen”

  1. Ani says:
    Reply
    Ani's avatar

    ok! I see what Debbie meant when she recommended I read your writings. I was laughing out loud to the 1st answer on this list of silly FB questions.

    I 100% agree with her on you compiling a book!

    Thanks for the laughs!

Leave a comment